Maxine Gower, LCSW, NCPsyA - Boulder Psychotherapy


Psychotherapy in person, via skype, or by phone. Please email or call (303) 875-5046

Boulder Therapy & Counseling Services

Short term and long term psychotherapy & psychoanalysis.
In person in Boulder or By phone.

Click the links below to find out more about each service.

 

Marriage Counseling

In couples work there is a focus on both members of the couple learning to speak freely, calmly and honestly about themselves and what they experience in the relationship, in a way that can be heard by the other partner. When this becomes the ground for communication, safety and trust become the basis of the couples work and of the relationship in general. Once respectful listening and openness become routine, hope and love return and healing and rebuilding can take place.

Click here to view full article: Relationship/Marriage Counseling
Click here to view full article in blog: Power Struggle in Marriage and Intimate Relationships
Click here to view full article: Intimacy
Click here to view full article: Aggression

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Family Therapy

A family is a very elaborate and complex system. One of the main reasons for this is that parents unavoidably bring their families of origin with them to the new family they create. Unconscious feelings, beliefs and behaviors get played out with a new cast of characters in the next generation. Children will reflect back to their parents a lot of what is felt and believed as well as what is not working well in the family. They are, in a manner of speaking, “the canaries in the coal mine” of a family.

Each family has a unique way of working things out with one another. It is the job of the therapist to figure out how this process can best be set in motion to suit each family so that they can grow and thrive.

Click here to view full article: Family Therapy

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Empathy for Parents going through the Adolescent Roller-coaster.

It is my hope that the information I offer here will make a difference in the lives of parents and their adolescents. Perhaps the information will serve to calm some situations and/or give parents an anchor while riding the adolescent roller-coaster. It may also give a sense of how I view adolescence and a feel for how I work.

First and foremost, please know that the suffering that you feel as a parent has a direct relationship to how much your child is suffering as they transition into adulthood. The way that adolescents ask for help is by acting out their confusion and frustrations for others to see and feel. With hormones raging and surging, it is not always possible for them to be verbal and rational in the explication of their experience. Instead, what adolescents do is get us to feel just the way that they do, in the hope that we will come to their aid.  

Click here to view full article: Empathy for Parents of Adolescents

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Psychotherapy with Adolescents

I really enjoy working with teens. Because I connect well with teens I have a lot of success in helping parents to better understand their adolescent children as well as helping teens to understand themselves and work more cooperatively with their parents, peers and others.
The typical struggle for teenagers are separation/autonomy issues, self concept issues and fitting in and feeling accepted by peers. Teens feel a lot of relief when they can talk to an adult who allows them to have all of their feelings, who can tolerate their ambivalence and inconsistencies and who understands the teen experience in general.

When teens learn to identify feelings, are able to articulate how they are feeling at any given point and are able to make them selves understood, they develop a sense of agency and self esteem. These are the building blocks for advocating for oneself, for taking responsibility for ones’ thoughts, feelings and actions and for negotiating complex interactions in daily life.

Click here to view full article: Psychotherapy with Adolescents

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Loss and Grief

A therapeutic relationship can be as a sanctuary where one can feel seen, heard and understood. Facing the unknown, due to loss, can feel daunting. The presence of a supportive and comforting person, trained in this work, can help one to move through grief, face the future and rebuild a life. I have 21 years of experience in working with people who have experienced loss and grief of various sorts.

Click here to view full article: Loss and Grief

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Fertility Counseling

De-stressing both mentally and physically has a lot to do with being able to get pregnant. Talking about the feelings that inevitably arise due to fertility issues and getting all the support that one needs as one goes through this demanding and challenging phase of life are ways to reduce stress.
When fertility treatments are successful one can move on and enjoy one's hard earned success. However, when treatments fail, one is faced with tough choices. Does one, or the couple, want to adopt, choose a donor egg or accept a life without children? These can be very tough and painful decisions.

Fertility counseling can be a good place to develop and exercise "one's voice" so as to say what it is that one feels, needs and desires. I have both experience and expertise in this area,  and can help with figuring out which decision is best for oneself or for the couple.

Click here to view full article: Fertility Counseling

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Separation / Divorce Counseling

As a practitioner, I am experienced in working with people during all phases of divorce:

  1. The decision to divorce.
  2. Understanding and navigating the legal process, including knowing what your options are.
  3. Developing parenting plans.
  4. Recovering, repairing and refocusing after divorce.

Click here to view full article: Separation and Divorce Counseling

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Counseling for the Aged and their Caregivers

As we age, talking can be a very powerful tool. Feeling seen, heard, valued and understood can make an essential difference to an aging person. Coming to terms with losses of various sorts and the inevitability of death can feel like a relief and a release when talked about. Talking with someone can allay feelings of isolation and loneliness due loss of friends and family who are not longer around or available for contact.

As a mental health practitioner, with experience working with the elderly, their families and caretakers, I can help with psychotherapy, advocacy and case management. This includes working with people who have dementia and Alzheimer's disease, at home or in facilities.

Click here to view full article: Counseling for the Aged and their Caregivers

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Psychotherapy & Psychoanalysis

My work as a therapist and analyst for the past 21 years has involved freeing people from painful states of mind and distorted beliefs which cause suffering. Suffering can occur when defenses are habitually used and when one blames or devalues oneself for the outcome of defenses which no longer work. Taking the time to talk, so as to understand the underlying causes of one's suffering, requires careful exploration … like performing a delicate operation.  

When one develops awareness through being in a therapeutic relationship, there truly is hope. This is possible because a therapy is a process where one can talk freely so as to feel seen and heard, safe and understood. And, with this as a base, trust inevitably grows. More and more, one feels free to have and accept all of one's feelings. This is how new neural pathways are built in the brain (at any time of life) and how abiding change takes place.

Over time the psychotherapeutic or analytic process allows one to know oneself, to know what one wants and to freely choose what is most important for the full and meaningful life one deserves.

Click here to view full article: Freedom

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Dream Analysis

Dream analysis is central to psychoanalysis. It is the art of understanding how the unconscious speaks to one in the language of symbols. Some think that the symbols in dreams are universal. Though this may be part of what goes on in dreams, the school in which I am trained feels that what is equally true, is that one also creates, borrows and uses symbols that emerge out of, and are relevant to, one’s particular life story.

The symbols in our dreams both reveal and conceal feelings and thoughts. There can be good reasons for this. Dreams allow one to slowly recognize what it is that one might otherwise choose to ignore or deny. The indirect ways in which dreams “talk” to one helps the dreamer to prepare to integrate thoughts and feelings that might have been prohibited for some reason.

In order to understand dreams, the analyst needs to get to know the dreamer well enough to help her/him to “read” the dreams. Within the therapeutic relationship the analyst is able to facilitate the patient’s translation of the symbols in her/his dreams into every day language that is relevant to the dreamer.

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